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s-lingbanger:

one of the worst moments in life is probably when you’re in a room full of people and you look around and see them all talking and laughing and all of sudden you feel so sad and lonely that you can even feel a physical pain in your chest because you realize that they all belong to someone and they all have someone who belongs to them and you don’t, you’re just kind of there

(Source: zayhun, via kn4ckered)

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lordoftheinternet:

i’m glad the shit that lives in the ocean lacks the ability to leave the ocean because most of it is scary as fuck

(via fake-mermaid)

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madamateur:

trying to drink hot tea while wearing glasses more like

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where the fuck did the laptop go

(via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

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(via urgently)

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inspired by x x

(via star-lordman)

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hatredly:

alarm clock: because every morning should begin with a heart attack

(via urgently)

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fluffixation:

pile-of-fail:

ivyinspace:

The perfect cuddling couch.

That is not a couch. That is a nest, and I want one.

My idea of household heaven right here.

fluffixation:

pile-of-fail:

ivyinspace:

The perfect cuddling couch.

That is not a couch. That is a nest, and I want one.

My idea of household heaven right here.

(via spork)

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(Source: laramoria, via star-lordman)

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batlock:

So.

Cards Against Humanity.

I’m a big fan. Well, I bought this.

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It’s great. It hold all of my shit. But it holds something else too.

If you have it, open your box.

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You see how I started to tear away at the top of the box there?

Do that.

Do it carefully.

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Holy shit.

There’s something in there. What could that be?

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There’s a card.

There is a card literally hidden in the top of the box.

But what card?

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I fucking love these people.

(via inthe-dark-ofthe-night)

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aliveontuesday:

the-chubby-nerd:

Story time:
While taking put the trash at work, I kicked this little bag of pennies. Obviously, since I’m poor, a grabbed them and threw them in my pocket before going on with the rest of my shift.
Close to the end of my shift, I remembered this bag of pennies, so I took it out and counted it out. 7 cents.
My coworker came up and started talking to me while I was doing this, so we chatted, the entire time, this tiny bag of pennies in my hand.
Meanwhile, one of my managers sees me and my coworker talking over this bag, immediately thinks that it’s drugs, yells, and grabs both of us and drags us to the back room.
So, we’re sitting there, me clutching this bag of pennies in my fist, while my manager gets my GM on the phone, yelling about how we were “trading drugs during our shift” and “endangering ourselves and other in the workplace.”
Within 10 minutes, my GM was there, papers in hand to terminate our employment, talking about how they should call the cops. I started crying, cause they wouldn’t let me get a word in edge-wise, my coworker was actually texting his dad the entire time, trying to get them to come fight for him.
It wasn’t until the GM asked what drug they were that they finally let me talk.
So, while I was sobbing, I opened my hand and dropped the bag in my manager’s hand.
And he bursts out laughing.
Within seconds I had explained everything, the pennies, the situation, everything.
I almost got fired and arrested over 7 pennies.

Your manager is a piece of shit.

aliveontuesday:

the-chubby-nerd:

Story time:

While taking put the trash at work, I kicked this little bag of pennies. Obviously, since I’m poor, a grabbed them and threw them in my pocket before going on with the rest of my shift.

Close to the end of my shift, I remembered this bag of pennies, so I took it out and counted it out. 7 cents.

My coworker came up and started talking to me while I was doing this, so we chatted, the entire time, this tiny bag of pennies in my hand.

Meanwhile, one of my managers sees me and my coworker talking over this bag, immediately thinks that it’s drugs, yells, and grabs both of us and drags us to the back room.

So, we’re sitting there, me clutching this bag of pennies in my fist, while my manager gets my GM on the phone, yelling about how we were “trading drugs during our shift” and “endangering ourselves and other in the workplace.”

Within 10 minutes, my GM was there, papers in hand to terminate our employment, talking about how they should call the cops. I started crying, cause they wouldn’t let me get a word in edge-wise, my coworker was actually texting his dad the entire time, trying to get them to come fight for him.

It wasn’t until the GM asked what drug they were that they finally let me talk.

So, while I was sobbing, I opened my hand and dropped the bag in my manager’s hand.

And he bursts out laughing.

Within seconds I had explained everything, the pennies, the situation, everything.

I almost got fired and arrested over 7 pennies.

Your manager is a piece of shit.

(via inthe-dark-ofthe-night)

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carriesfirstperiod:

my mom just looked at a spider at our kitchen and yelled “why do you have to be like that? you dont need that many eyes or legs you need to stop”

(Source: lmpossibleprincess, via fake-mermaid)

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unconflated:

that moment when you mess up a word so often it becomes a default auto correct

(via fake-mermaid)

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internetgf:

i feel like i got a virus from reblogging this

internetgf:

i feel like i got a virus from reblogging this

(Source: lavagoth, via fake-mermaid)

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moonblossom:

221cbakerstreet:

qwanderer:

thisisevenharderthannamingablog:

girl-farts:

kingcheddarxvii:

notviolet:

Chris Pratt Interrupts Interview To French Braid Intern’s Hair

SHUT THE HELL U P

this man has gone too far

damn

Where does Marvel FIND these people?

Imagine - Chris Pratt and Jeremy Renner show up to your door the night of prom and your parents are like WHY DO YOU HAVE TWO DATES AND WHY ARE THEY SO BIG AND BEEFY AND INTIMIDATING but Chris is just like “Nah I’m hair” and Jeremy raises his hand and says “And I’m makeup”

surprisingly well done

If this doesn’t result in an AU where Hawkeye and Star-Lord decide to retire and open a salon together, I don’t know what we’re all doing with our lives.

(Source: chrisprattdelicious, via inthe-dark-ofthe-night)

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samandriel:

covetxvx:

a metaphor of my life

best moment on television. ever.

(Source: falloutdouche, via inthe-dark-ofthe-night)